dear silly girl,
i’ve taken to reading Dr. James Dobson anything. i’m sure that in some way, i’m warping you, and i just want to be aware of it.
Dr. Dobson separates children into three categories: strong willed, compliant, and shy. well, you’re all of those things at different times so i have no idea how i’m suppose to be disciplining you. Maybe that’s later in the book.
anyway, let me just tell you what has driven me to check out a parenting book.
apparently, i am a source of great annoyance to you. i find this perplexing. how can you be annoyed with someone who waits on you hand and foot and doesn’t “accidentally” knock you off of her when she’s sitting in a chair and suddenly finds you on her shoulders with your feet in her face? it’s a mystery.
the other night, you were in trouble for peeing in your pants and i had put you in the corner. i do this because you hate the corner and you would think that would deter you from doing these things, but no. anyway, you apparently put your sassy pants on because you poked your head around the corner and said, “mama, you’re getting on my nerves!”
me: what the… casey, you’re getting on my nerves, too, so put your face back in the corner!
daddy was outside on the porch and i needed his support to keep from busting out laughing or dying from shock.
did you hear what she just said to me?
she just told me i was getting on her nerves.
oh. that’s probably my fault. i said that to her earlier by accident. she was hitting my computer keys and ignoring everything i said.
you should have made her stop.
because clearly the corner is working.
something has to work. i need to check out some books.
now, you are not bad all the time or even most of the time. you just have moments, and i’m sure it’s just because you’re a two year old. i just don’t want you to grow up to be a brat. my parents were extreme in their discipline methods and daddy’s parents were kind of lax. we just want to find a happy medium.
but until we find the magical, child-raising remedy, you’re a great source of entertainment and we do the best be can.
we were sitting in your room the other night when i informed you that it wouldn’t be too long before santa would be stopping by to bring you some new toys. this apparently was just the information you needed to supply me with a pep talk.
mama, don’t be mean to santa. he’s nice. he brings me toys.
i’m not mean to santa.
mama, don’t do it. don’t be mean to him. he’s nice.
i’m not going to be mean to santa!
mama, being mean is a no no. don’t do it.
okay, okay! i’ve got it already!
i don’t know why you think i’d be mean to santa, but that must just be my way. i’m a big ol’ meanie!
then this morning, you couldn’t find your play credit card that goes to your princess cash register. this must be your mother’s fault.
mama, where is my card?
i don’t know, sweetie.
yes, you do! where is it? what you do with it?
i haven’t had your credit card, dear. it’s probably in your room. look in your play house.
huuuumphft. you got it. get my card!
if it’s gone, then you lost it. i have no need for credit cards without real money on them.
you’ll live. it’s probably better that you lost it anyway. those credit cards are all fun and games until the bill arrives.
even for princesses.